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MIDL 32/52: Forgiveness: Healing the Heart

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In MIDL Mindfulness Training 32/52 it is time to develop forgiveness towards yourself and others in order to put down the pain of the past. Forgiveness does not say that what happened is ok, but rather it says "What has happened, has happened and I can not change it; I will not suffer over this anymore". As long as we do not forgive our self or others we will be living a life conditioned by our relationship to the past. By putting down our pain through forgiveness, the pains of the past come to an end and awareness more easily dwells within the present experience creating the conditions for wisdom to arise. Submit Your Question

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How To Practice

Your Question: What are the words and order of this forgiveness meditation?

Stephen Procter: Forgiveness acknowledges: “What happened may have been wrong, but it can’t be changed and I will not suffer over this anymore.”

Step 1: Ask Yourself for Forgiveness
Sit down, close your eyes and bring yourself to mind. Forgive yourself for all the things you have done to bring harm to yourself.

“(your name here), if I have done anything to hurt you in any way, knowingly or unknowingly, please forgive me.”

Say this slowly and gently with meaning three times and each time picture yourself gently saying back: “I forgive you.”

Step 2: Ask Another for Forgiveness
Now think of someone that you have hurt in some way. Ask for their forgiveness to allow healing by silently saying to them:

“(their name here), if I have done anything to hurt you in any way, knowingly or unknowingly, please forgive me.”

Say this slowly and gently with meaning three times and each time picture them gently saying back to you: “I forgive you.”

Step 3: Offer Forgiveness to Another
Now think of someone that has hurt you in some way. Offer them your forgiveness to allow healing by silently saying to them:

“(their name here), for any hurt that you have caused me, in any way, knowingly or unknowingly, I forgive you.”

Say this slowly and gently with meaning three times and each time picture them gently saying back to you: “thank you.”


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Moves too Slow

Your Question: This guidance in this meditation moves a little too slow for me but the words are so important!

Stephen Procter: For the practice of forgiveness to have an impact on the heart we need to move slowly and 'feel' the suppressed emotions within the heart / mind, softening into any resistance and dwelling in the feeling of acceptance. This 'felt' connection is necessary to take the meditation practice from just words to a doorway to opening the heart.


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Pain in My Heart

Your Question: I struggle with my guilt and sorrow but made it through the tears to the end. Interesting that one listener felt the pace too slow, while I felt it rather quick for the amount of pain in my heart. I appreciate you Stephen.

Stephen Procter: It is helpful to understand that anything that arises as a memory about what you have done in the past tells you everything about the person that you were, but it tells you nothing about the person who is sitting here right now. What has been done has been done, it is fixed, the question is: What have you learnt from it? It is time to put down the pain of the past, learn from it and create the person you want to be 'now'. Your future is a blank slate, use it to create something beautiful.


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